Parenting
has immensely evolved over the years. Once upon a time children went to bed at
7:00pm, nowadays, I see children at the cinemas at 10:00pm. Trivial point you
may say, but this change in values goes deeper. Take the American society for
example, where it is a norm for children to insult their parents. I remember
standing at a bus station in London, and a young boy, about fourteen years old,
said “get out of the way bitch”. An elderly lady standing beside me was utterly
disgusted. I really could not blame the young boy, as I could only imagine him
insulting his parents. If a child dishonours his parents, then I can expect him
to dishonour me, or any other stranger. Charity they say begins at home. Children’s
birthday parties have also evolved, children no longer have dancing
competitions, treasure hunts, or spelling bees. Now we have parents organising
spa parties for five year olds.
Proverbs
22:6 says “Train up a child in the way he should go, And when he is old he will
not depart from it”. As a parent, what seeds are you planting in the hearts of
your children? Are you in the bid to have your children label you as “cool”, or
“modernised” raising children of Baal. A new trend I see, particularly with new
generation mothers, is mothers using their children as a tool to compete with
other mothers. Consequently, children are having access to devices at an early
age. I see five year olds with iPhones, iPods, iPads, etc. You may be asking
yourself, “what’s wrong with that”, but tell me how you can prevent that child
from visiting pornographic sites, engage in idle talk, etc. You may also say “but
the child would visit pornographic sites whether or not I buy him/her an iPhone”.
Then I would say you shoot yourself in the head right now, because you may die
someday so why wait. Do I hear you say something?
What
are you teaching your children? Does your child know the Ten Commandments; have
you taught them to pray, do you tell them about Jesus? Or are they spending
more time watching Barney, Dora the explorer, listening to Justin Beiber on
their expensive iPods? God expects parents to raise their children to serve
Him. Parents will answer to God for every child He entrusts to their care. One
reason God blessed Abraham was because God knew he would raise Godly children.
That requires commanding children to do right, and not just making suggestions
and allowing children to choose what they think is best. In Genesis 18:19 God
said “For I have known him, in order that he may command his children and his
household after him, that they keep the way of the Lord, to do righteousness
and justice, that the Lord may bring to Abraham what He has spoken to him”. Are
you commanding your children, or are they being the Parents and commanding you?
If
children do not obey, they must be corrected. It is part of the training
process so they will learn to do right. The Bible teaches that this should be
done by using a rod of correction. It is your responsibility as a Parent to
discover what rod of correction works for your child. Proverbs 23: 13-14 states
“Do not withhold correction from a child, for if you beat him with a rod, he
will not die; you shall beat him with a rod, and deliver his soul from hell”. This
should however not be an excuse to physically abuse your child; spanking
children should not be to punish them for their wrong, but to help correct
them. Remember Ephesians 6:4 which states “And you, fathers, do not provoke
your children to wrath, but bring them up in the training and admonition of the
Lord”. The rod of correction correctly and prayerfully used by a loving parent will
produce emotionally healthy and happy children.
No
matter how worthless you feel as a parent, you are your child’s first role
model, and therefore you should live an exemplary life because children are natural
imitators. Deuteronomy 6: 5-7 states: "You
shall love the Lord your God with all your heart, with all your soul, and with
all your might. And these words which I command you today shall be in your
heart; you shall teach them diligently to your children, and shall talk of them
when you sit in your house, when you walk by the way, when you lie down, and
when you rise up”.
If
you do not practise what you preach to your children, they would see you as a
hypocrite. As a mother are you obeying Colossians 3:18 “Wives, submit to your
own husbands, as is fitting in the Lord”, or are your children seeing you
dominating and dishonouring your husband. As a father are you obeying Colossians
3:19 “Husbands, love your wives and do not be bitter toward them”. You must put God's Word first and walk in
love toward your children to succeed as a parent. Give them time and attention.
Do things together. Play with them and talk with them. Showing love to them,
and teaching them about God are essential. You should not yell at your children
or provoke them to wrath. Parent's words are extremely important. Build your
children up: encourage them and praise them. Tell them you love them. And may
the grace of God be with you, even as you have decided to train up your
children in His way. If
you have failed in raising your children, cry out to God for forgiveness and
help. He will forgive you and help you. As long as your children are still
alive, there is hope for God to change them. If you will pray in faith, obey
God, and walk in love, God will work in your children's lives and change them.
No comments:
Post a Comment